-Confused

I am so mad all the time but I don’t know why
Sometimes I feel so confused, out of place, and shy
It’s like I want to know who I am, what I am, and why I live
I think to myself sometimes, it’s difficult , though I still thrive
I think about the future, forget about the past, and still no answer
I just do my things, things to be done, but I don’t know what I am reaching for
I want to scream out loud, out of reach of everyone, just want to think, stop the time
For once in a while, perspective of my friends is different, I act differently and just mime
I don’t know what I think about life, life is a pure gift, but I don’t know what is the meaning of it, what’s the point of it
Sometimes I just give up even though I am so close to reaching for what I don’t know, and give in, don’t ask why, I don’t know
I sometimes am confident, loud, a whole different person and people say whoa!
I hate people, friends, family, anything, you name it, I hate it for no reason sometimes
Sometimes I look up at something, then it’s no longer what I wanted, what I wished
I try to bring my old self again, it doesn’t work out, I’m no longer that girl
It’s like a twirl, I’m confused, and I’m mad but I don’t know why